Of Mothers and Daughters

In healthy families there is usually a very strong bond between mother and daughter. I know when my daughter is sad or stressed just like my own mother can pick up on my emotions long before anyone else can. In the same way, I know when something really special has happened that she can’t wait to share with me. Mothers and daughters have a connection that is uniquely visceral and invisible at the same time, and oftentimes neither of them can imagine life without the other. I am grateful that I have a daughter with whom I enjoy spending time and with whom I enjoy doing things that only women really get into.


Like shopping.* Yesterday, we got up and went to the spa for a haircut and manicure/pedicures. Claire got about seven inches cut from her long tresses, and the resulting hair-do is fabulous on her. Something she said struck me as important: “I wanted to do something for me.” How often do we fear being selfish, trying to please others important to us or who we perceive as important? Sometimes a haircut is just a haircut; other times it’s something that makes a statement and gives us a new sense of who we are and what we want in our day-to-day lives.

After the beauty treatments, we had a healthy lunch of salads at Fatz Café, and while we were there, we did my grocery shopping at Bilo. That, too, is something mothers and daughters can really enjoy doing together. It’s a bonding experience. I love to show her my savvy in shopping for bargains, and we share ideas for cooking and what works in a household where everyone is busy during the day. I’m impressed with all she’s learned about being a homemaker.

After lunch, we headed to the shopping center. I had a $50 gift card that was burning a hole in my wallet. We shopped the Labor Day sales, and actually came away with some really good bargains. She got three new tops and a jacket while I purchased new tops and one new pair of pants. All in all we spent the equivalent of $300.00. With the coupons and gift card, however, we came away spending less than half that amount. I’d say we did all right.

If you are lucky enough to have a daughter with whom you have bonded, you know the kind of love I’m talking about here. If your relationship is one that needs working on, then I hope you will take the time to try to make it a better situation for the both of you. God’s love is reflected in the love we share with each other. God’s love is like a mother’s love for her daughter, and our love for God is no less than that of a child who sees past our human imperfections to the wisdom and grace that are part of that Divine mystery of who we are as mothers and friends. May you feel richly blessed by those who call you mother, daughter, father, or son.

*Apologies to those English majors who can’t let a sentence fragment slide in now and again. It just seemed appropriate to this piece.